i am normally a pretty good morning person. i wake up to the sound of 3 alarms at random times between 5:30 and 6:30 (my wife has to set several different clocks to make herself get out of bed and repeatedly hits snooze). i got out of bed in record time this morning. i was out of the shower before 6:45 and i didn't cut myself shaving either. i try to give myself enough time to check my e-mail, watch some videos, eat breakfast, make my dog some eggs (laugh), and iron my clothes. yet somehow i almost ran out of time. first my shirt would not iron. i sprayed it down with water and had the iron as hot as i could get it (this is where you say my wife should be doing this for me). my tie would not tie straight (insert joke here). i was feeling stressed even before i had left the house.
when i went outside to feed my puppy....i stepped in poop. not good. then wondergirl jumped on me and put her paw prints so sweetly on my pants. i allowed myself to swear once (only once.. i promise. it wasn't a major one. it's one that you would hear in a PG movie). i actually kicked her. not hard, cause she thought i was playing. she kept doin it. i gave her the eggs and left. yet as i walked away i felt bad for kicking her. i went back and loved on her. ran to my car and took off. i got behind this really slow person. i tail gated them all the way to the high school (thankfully they turned, but waved). it was my pastor's wife..
so now i am at work waiting for court to start. we have over 200 cases today. so yay!!!
let you in on what i have learned this week.
1. you really can't lick your elbow.
2. you can't lick your own nipple (someone dared me to and i tried and i couldn't. this maybe something i shouldn't share).
3.puppy poop is not easy to wash out of dress shoes.
4.no matter how much water you spray; wrinkles do not come out. use more fabric softener.
5.farting in your desk chair makes it not as loud, but the smell will stick in it.
that's just a few of the things that i have learned so far this week and it is only tuesday. i can't wait to share what i learn today.
oh and i also learned that you have to be in church everytime the doors are open.. yeah.. i know. i had no clue. must be one of those things Jesus forgot to tell us about.