Thursday, May 17, 2007

the man in orange

today i had a lot of things on my mind. work, my friend coming into town, youth group party, and a mexican restaurant. needless to say my mind was not on the road. while driving i passed a man hitch hiking.i came close to hitting him, but he didn't see it. i figured he was probably heading to town and it really wasn't that far of a walk..i was also running late to meet my friend for some mexican food. so i sped by, yet when i passed our eyes met. i felt bad.(i have a habit of picking up hitch hikers when i am alone. my mom says it is stupid, but my dad thinks it is cool). i turned around at the baptist church (have you ever thought it was strange that the baptist don't believe baptism saves, but the church of Christ does.. it seems like they would since it is in their name, but who am i to question such things). when i came back he hopped in my car and we took off to the big city of beattyville. we talked. i learned a little about his life and where he was from. the whole time i felt like i had met him before. i dropped him off at his destination and headed to mine. when i arrived at the mexican restaurant (which i actually heard a man complain about how the owners didn't speak english very well. if he has a problem with it... why go there? some people are stupid. sometimes i am one of them, but today.. no sir. i wasn't that retard). i was explaining to junior why i was late and how i think i knew this man. we both assumed it was from my days working at the hardware store. while stuffing my face and hearing junior talk about his girl problems it hit me. i know where i have met this man before. (if you don't remember i work at the courthouse and i am in all of the trials that take place in our wonderful city). i looked up at junior and said "he was in an orange jumper with chains the last time i saw him." that is right. i picked up a man that was in prison last week.
yeah.. sorry.. not very good story telling. i have not been sleeping much these past few days. it seems that i have been having weird dreams. dreams that wake me up in a sweat. i find it hard to return to sleep after i see the images of toy airplanes with cameras looking for me, while hiding in a box. praying that they won't hear my heart beating. yeah.. i need to stop watching so much television..

Tuesday, May 08, 2007

wrinkles and puppy poop

i am normally a pretty good morning person. i wake up to the sound of 3 alarms at random times between 5:30 and 6:30 (my wife has to set several different clocks to make herself get out of bed and repeatedly hits snooze). i got out of bed in record time this morning. i was out of the shower before 6:45 and i didn't cut myself shaving either. i try to give myself enough time to check my e-mail, watch some videos, eat breakfast, make my dog some eggs (laugh), and iron my clothes. yet somehow i almost ran out of time. first my shirt would not iron. i sprayed it down with water and had the iron as hot as i could get it (this is where you say my wife should be doing this for me). my tie would not tie straight (insert joke here). i was feeling stressed even before i had left the house.
when i went outside to feed my puppy....i stepped in poop. not good. then wondergirl jumped on me and put her paw prints so sweetly on my pants. i allowed myself to swear once (only once.. i promise. it wasn't a major one. it's one that you would hear in a PG movie). i actually kicked her. not hard, cause she thought i was playing. she kept doin it. i gave her the eggs and left. yet as i walked away i felt bad for kicking her. i went back and loved on her. ran to my car and took off. i got behind this really slow person. i tail gated them all the way to the high school (thankfully they turned, but waved). it was my pastor's wife..
so now i am at work waiting for court to start. we have over 200 cases today. so yay!!!
let you in on what i have learned this week.
1. you really can't lick your elbow.
2. you can't lick your own nipple (someone dared me to and i tried and i couldn't. this maybe something i shouldn't share).
3.puppy poop is not easy to wash out of dress shoes. matter how much water you spray; wrinkles do not come out. use more fabric softener.
5.farting in your desk chair makes it not as loud, but the smell will stick in it.
that's just a few of the things that i have learned so far this week and it is only tuesday. i can't wait to share what i learn today.
oh and i also learned that you have to be in church everytime the doors are open.. yeah.. i know. i had no clue. must be one of those things Jesus forgot to tell us about.